“My Mother & I” — the complicated inheritance of love

!!! a small warning before you read: this post touches on body image and emotional themes.

My Mother & I is a part of Lucy Dacus’ holiday singles series–an ambitious project she announced on January 31, 2019, where each song would be tied to a different holiday–this particular track was written in honor of Mother’s Day. And somehow, in just a few minutes, it captures one of the strangest parts of growing up: realizing you're becoming more like your mother while simultaneously trying to figure out who you are on your own. It's sweet, complicated, and emotionally devastating enough to make me stare at a wall for a bit afterward. 

My Mother & I Single Art  I  Copyright: Matador Records

My Mother & I

Artist:  Lucy Dacus

Year:  2019

Chorus

The stars have a lot to say

About babies born in the month of May

We are down to Earth

We see eye to eye

We dig our feet in

My mother and I

My mother and I 

My mom and I weren’t born in May–in fact, we were actually born in completely different months–but I still find myself drawn to the line “we see eye to eye.” More than anything, it captures our closeness. My mom has always been one of my favorite people, and as I’ve gotten older, I’ve realized how much of who I am has been shaped by her. And I love that.

Verse 2

They called me an old soul

When I was too young to know

The difference between a soul and a ghost

I feared what was inside

Trapped in my body kept from the other side

A spirit searching for her second life

There’s something so raw and heavy about feeling too much, too early. I’ve also feared what was inside. For me, it was overwhelming emotions that I didn’t know how to carry, let alone understand. When you’re young, people call you mature, an old soul, or sensitive, but no one really tells you what to do when your inner world feels bigger than you are. That’s why these lyrics hit so hard–they capture that strange feeling of being trapped between who you are and who you’re still trying to become. 

Chorus (excerpt)

We want love

Warm and forever

We want to die in the presence of our loved ones

My mother and I

My mother and I 

These lyrics hit me hard because, at the end of the day, all my mom and I have ever really wanted is to love and be loved. There’s something so simple about that desire, yet it’s probably one of the most universal human experiences. After all, one of the greatest gifts in life is having people who stay–people who choose you again and again, and who make life feel a little less lonely. And if I’m being honest, that’s all my mom and I have ever really wanted too. 

Outro

All she has given

All I have taken

All is forgiven

All is forsaken 

These lines just reminded me that being a mother is one of the hardest jobs in the world–the endless giving, even when it isn’t always returned, and still choosing love and understanding through exhaustion, pain, and silence. 

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Favorite !

My mother hates her body

We share the same outline

She swears that she loves mine

I blur at the edges

I'm all soft shapes and lines

Shapeshifting all the time 

When I first heard the opening, I immediately wanted to text her that I love her. It quietly made me think about how a mother can struggle with her own body while still seeing beauty in her child, even when she can’t see it in herself. It’s a reminder of how love and insecurity can exist in the same space.

My Mother & I I Bandcamp

At the end of it all, I think this song just reminds me that love between a mother and child is never simple, but it is always there–steady even when it feels complicated. If anything, I hope we learn to be gentler with ourselves and with the strong women who raised us, because they were once just girls trying to figure things out too. I love my mom, and I carry that love quietly and fully, even in the parts of life that don’t always make sense yet.. and I hope she knows that..

D.

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